If people are telling you something can’t be done, be sure that they have the experience to know so. (And even then, sharing your ideas is risky.)
Most of the time, we look for support from friends and family, hoping that they will encourage us. A lot of the time their concern for us — not wanting us to fail, get hurt, waste money — is caring and considerate, but it generates unhelpful feedback in the form of, “Well, uh, what if A, B or C happen? That would be bad.”
Outside of innocent concern, other people with little to no experience in risk-taking will often criticize an idea in order to protect their world view. If you have a daring, novel idea and you were to succeed, they would have to admit that they see the world incorrectly, perhaps have even failed in their own lives. Nobody likes to admit they’re wrong, especially on such a grand scale. It’s a defense mechanism to protect their own fragile sense of self.
My recommendation: Don’t tell anyone your plans until your plans have enough momentum that they can’t be stopped. Like small saplings against the elements, ideas have to be protected until they have enough strength to stand on their own.
Act purposefully but minimally and keep your reasons under wraps, was a lesson he taught me. Not the whole formula for life, but quite a beginning, because love and openness to what you love are fragile and yet will flower if cupped and sunlit: as will a freelance toughness and survivability, when you need that.
~ Edward Hoagland, Small Silences
